Driving Pet Peeves

My buddy sent me this article from USAToday. It inspired me to come up with my own driving pet peeves list. Enjoy...

1. Not using your turn signal.

Of course, with my last post, this had to be number one. Read more about it here.

2. People that are trying to turn onto the street I'm on, and sticking up to half of their car into the road.

Seriously, people, learn the parameters of the car you're driving. If you think you're in the way of oncoming traffic, you probably are. And if you started to turn, but then realized you couldn't make it, back the fuck up! I'm not looking to get t-boned by you. And I sure as hell ain't looking to swerve out of the way to avoid your stupid ass.

3. Leaving at least three car lengths in front of you when you're stuck in traffic.

Not sure if you think the car you're driving is way too precious to have anyone as much as breathe on it, but when you're leaving that much space in front of you, you're still holding up traffic. Imagine if everyone on the road did what you were doing. No one would get anywhere. Oh, you're on your phone and not paying attention? Great excuse. Inch up, buddy. No one will hit your car. I promise.

4. Passing me on the highway just in the nick of time.

You know you want to pass me, so how about not coming within inches of my car before doing so? I saw you coming from 500 feet away in my rear view and you've had plenty of time to get over. How about not scaring the bejeezus out of me?

5. Motorcycles.

We often hear "Share the road with motorcycles." Ten bucks says you can't find one person who feels this way. It's more like the other way around. Nine out of ten bikers on the road are weaving in and out of cars, switching lanes like crazy, narrowly avoiding the cars they should be sharing the road with. Act like a car and I'll treat you like one. And, by the way, the speed limit isn't meant to be doubled by motorcycles. Die in a fiery crash.

6. Slow out of the gate.

Presumably, you've been driving for more than a week, so you realize the general traffic light patterns. The left lanes have that special green light. Guess who's next to go? If you don't realize you're first in line in a heap of traffic, you're just a dickhead. If I'm counting to three before you step on the gas, expect to hear my horn, even if I'm five cars back.

7. Three-lane changers.

All too often do I see cars go from the left lane to the far right lane just to make an exit. This is pretty...um...what's that word?....DANGEROUS. See also: INSANE.

8. The highway heroes.

Keeping with the multi-lane switching theme, there's always that guy that thinks he owns the road. That he's the only one on the road. Or just thinks he's Dale Earnhardt, Jr. He'll tail you, then pass you on the right, then make a three lane switch and be gone. You can see him coming from a mile away (literally). Please don't be that guy.

9. Left lane is for lazy.

Actually, the left lane is for passing. There's a reason these signs exist. And don't give me the Maryland excuse, where it's supposedly not for passing anymore than any other lane is. Get out of the left lane. Seriously. And the left lane is certainly not for trucks. Especially during rush hour. There's a concept called "keep it movin'." And when you're not part of the cycle of passing and then moving back over to let the next guy pass and move back over to let the next guy pass and move back over, then you're fucking up traffic. Yeah, you have that much power. You can always point out the reason traffic has slowed down when you know it shouldn't be slowed down. It's the slow/oblivious/lazy/texting/stupid/stubborn person in the left lane.

10. Right turn on red.

This was mentioned in the USAToday article by one of the guest commenters. It's also one of mine. Even worse than the driver that doesn't turn right on red is the driver that doesn't heed the quick honk....then the double honk....then the prolonged hooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkkkkkk, realizing that it's a pretty good idea to get his head out of his ass that there are other people on the road and those honks are kinda sorta meant for you.

Honorable Mention

-Driving over the center line into my lane. If there was another you coming the other way, then there would be no yous at all. Simple math.

-Tinted windows on cars that limit the driver from making essential eye contact when at a three-/four-way stop sign.

-Driving with your high beams on when you shouldn't be - i.e., when you're coming right at me, especially after being given plenty of time and warning to turn your damn high beams off.

-Driving with your headlights off at night or in the rain and then not heeding the headlight flash warning I give you umpteen times. I hope you get pulled over.

The Case for Turn Signals

Recently (and by "Recently", I mean "Every day") I was driving and found myself behind a car that was headed into the left-hand turning lane. I knew this only from my combined depth and width perception. It was obviously going a different direction than "straight". As I approached the car, I was greeted with a blinking light on its left rear side. What is that, you say? Oh, that's a turn signal? It's as if the driver was letting the world know, "Hey, I'm turning left!" - except it wasn't. It was more the driver proclaiming "Hey, I'm making this light flash because I probably should let you know, if you didn't already, that I'm about to veer off this road and head elsewhere." In this case (and by "this case" I suppose I mean "this case", although it applies about half the time, if not way less), I was far enough behind the car that I didn't need to brake or swerve suddenly. But other times - too many to count - it doesn't seem to be that way. It isn't that way. And it's annoying. And it's really, really dangerous. Here's why: Turn signals are exactly what they say: signals. They are not connected to the other functions of a vehicle and can be triggered with very little effort. Their effect on those driving behind (and to the side and in front, which I'll get to later) are pretty minimal in physical response, but extremely maximal in mental response and preparation. The turn signal tells drivers to prepare for something more. Prepare to brake. Prepare to give me time, as I may not be able to get out of your way to make my way off this road. Prepare to give me space, which could trigger a domino effect with other cars to follow. The turn signal is something so small and insignificant to the driver using it, but is something very substantial to those outside of your car's zone. Outside of your zone. Your safe place. Your head, even. It's telling the other drivers in the public system that we call "roads" that you are only a small part of but carry a big responsibility towards that there is something that is going to happen that we all need to be aware of. Now let's go back to this example, and by "example" I mean "every time someone misuses or completely ignores their turn signal". Unless you're Michael Knight or one of the Dukes of Hazard, it's a fact that drivers need to slow down to make a turn. What does this entail? Braking. Lowering your speed from what it once was. Well, guess what? Again, unless you're an 80s TV character, chances are you're driving at a pretty steady pace. If someone brakes in front of you without letting you know, i.e., signalling, well, that can be pretty difficult to discern if you're not able to predict where everyone else on the road is going. Sure, we pass intersections. Sure, we approach turning lanes. But I got news for you. The rules of thumb on the road that include "right of way" also presume that everyone is driving straight on the road they're on. This is where the turn signal comes in. Let's go through some simple scenarios and you tell me which one is ideal for everyone involved, shall we? 1. Hit the brake, then turn, then put on your signal. 2. Hit the brake, put on your signal, then turn 3. Signal, brake, turn. I'd say most people do number 2 on a regular basis. They equate the "turn signal" with "turning". I get it. It's in the name. Why do I need to let anyone know I'm about to turn until I do? Well, that's dumb. Let's go back to scenario 1 to further ridulous-ize this theory. Brake, turn, then signal? Really? You might as well punch me in the face while your apologizing. Hey, as long as you got it out there, we're good. Except, NO. The point of the signal is to prepare, y'all! Prepare us all to make way for you to leave our status quo driving situation. And in today's society, where everyone seems to want attention, shouldn't we be chomping at the bit to alert everyone of our intentions? Except we're not, because preparation is not in our DNA. It's something we have to work on. It's something that we always seem to realize is a great thing to do only in hindsight. Let alone preparing to prepare others to make preparations to prepare? Again, this goes back to society - especially today's society. There's so much going on in the world that we tend to bring it into our cars with us. We're texting, we're listening to music, we're listening to podcasts with our earbuds in despite having the privacy of our own cars to cancel out that need, we're looking at our GPS, reading something on our phones, et cetera, et cetera, ad nauseam, et cetera, e pluribus unum, etc. We barely have enough time for ourselves, let alone anyone else. But here's the thing - it's not our private road. Public, public, public. Sure, we have the freedom to go wherever we want, but so does everyone else. And I got news for you - there's always everyone else on the road. It's a turn signal, and that's what we learned it was called in driver's ed. Well, guess what? It's really a brake signal. It's something to tell those behind you that it's time to interrupt the constant speed you've attained and slow down for others. It's really a courtesy signal. It's something to tell those coming the opposite way that you're about to make a turn and they need to adjust their route accordingly, be it by slowing down themselves or even going onto the road you're coming from. It's a traffic signal. It allows for others to modify and adjust so that they can fill in the empty spaces and adapt to a new traffic flow. Sure, we may not consider others on the road. We may even be afraid to tell them "Hey, I'm committing to this maneuver". But these foibles have no place on the road if we all expect to rid our world of accidents and road rage (which cause more accidents). It's time to resurrect the turn signal to its fullest extent. Be proud to use it. Use it in excess, as it doesn't use up battery life and gas (to my knowledge). When you're in the public driving domain, you need to be aware of and courteous towards your fellow drivers. Allow them to prepare and make way and give space. Because you got things to do - whether in your car or most likely outside of it. Let's not make going to the auto repair man or the hospital one of those things.

Will We Boo McNabb?

This weekend, Donovan McNabb makes his return to Philadelphia. He'll be wearing the gawd awful burgundy and gold with his new team, the already-hated Washington Redskins.

The question many have been pondering is "Will the fans boo McNabb?" Here's my take.

Before heading down I-95 to play for the enemy, #5 led the Eagles to multiple 10 win seasons, NFC Championship games, and one Super Bowl appearance. Whether he accomplished a lot is no argument - the Eagles had never seen that sustained level of success they saw with McNabb.

However, there are a few important points to mention. First, he never got over the hump. Given 5 opportunities to advance to a Super Bowl, McNabb only led us to one. And given the opportunity to win that one, he came up short. It's always tough to appreciate what you have when you have it, but it's even tougher to appreciate what you have when you think you should have had even more.

Second, it appeared that McNabb didn't quite feel our pain when he failed to clear these hurdles. Philly fans appreciate hard work, but also appreciate accountability, and it seemed McNabb was content with these shortcomings. Often, he'd shrug off serious questions or apply lip service to them, saying what he thought the fans wanted to hear and often missing the boat.

There's another factor that plays into what I think will happen on Sunday: how well the Eagles are playing right now. Currently, we have a quarterback at the helm who is playing better than McNabb and who many think is playing the way McNabb should have been playing throughout his career, by displaying mobility when the pocket breaks down. Michael Vick is doing everything right thus far, and Eagles fans are feeling quite good about themselves. Does that translate into boos or cheers?

One could take this to mean two different things. Either fans will cheer for McNabb and show respect for what he brought to this team over the last decade because they are generally in a good mood about the team; or, fans will already be in a booing mood for the Skins and keep that momentum going as #5 trots onto the field - sort of a "who needs him anyway?" mentality because things are looking good for our guys right now.

Honestly, I don't think the reaction will lean one way or another. I think we'll have a combination of boos and cheers. Some fans will be riled up already and want to boo the enemy through and through. Some fans won't be in that mode quite yet, as the kickoff wouldn't be happening a few minutes down the line anyways from when he first steps onto the field.

If I could quantify it, I'd say the ratio would be 60-40, boo-to-cheer. I think fans will do what it takes to fire up this team and the rest of the crowd this Sunday afternoon just to get a victory against our hated rival.

Some fans will be wearing their old McNabb Eagles' jerseys on Sunday. Some fans will be attending burning parties for those same jerseys. All fans will have McNabb on their mind one way or another.

One thing is clear - nearly 100% of this stadium will want to see the Iggles come out victorious and stay atop the NFC East. There will be some love. There will be some hate. Booing and cheering will both be part of the equation.

Why does Philly hate Kobe?

Last night I saw a snippet of an E:60 story on why Philly hates Kobe. They were saying it's because he didn't play for the Sixers or because he left the city for Los Angeles. With all due respect, Sonny Hill, I don't believe the glitz and glamor of L.A. has anything to do with it. Here's my take:

First off, Kobe isn't even from Philadelphia. He's from the Main Line, an affluent suburban area due west of the city. Specifically, he went to Lower Merion High School, which lays in a predominantly white neighborhood. Sure it's no prep or Catholic school that may tend to recruit, but it's one of the wealthier public schools you'll see.

On top of that, he lived in Italy for a few years before moving back to the Philadelphia area. The son of Joe "Jellybean" Bryant, a pro basketball player (and former Sixer), one could say Kobe didn't exactly come from the hood. And one would be right. Kobe was a cultured kid, fluent in Italian. Definitely not your typical city kid, let alone suburban one.

So there's that. One might demand, name me a high school star that Philly DOES love. Here are three that Philly definitely has welcomed home with a standing "O" and a warm embrace.

1. Rasheed Wallace
'Sheed went to Simon Gratz, a city school, for one. Sure, he left the area for North Carolina when he graduated and then went on to the NBA and played for a few teams that weren't the Sixers. And, sure, he's currently on the Celtics. Well, Philly doesn't have a problem with 'Sheed. He's a Philly kid. Not much argument here. Do we absolutely drool over this guy when he returns? No. But we do show respect, because he grew up here.

2. Bo Kimble
Bo went out to California with Hank Gathers (R.I.P.) for college. But Bo was from Dobbins Tech, a city school. The team came back to the area to play the likes of St. Joe's and LaSalle. People came out in droves to see Kimble (and Gathers and Paul Westhead, a Cheltenham guy) when he came back to play. He went on to the NBA and played for the Clippers. But, again, he was a Philly kid. Philly embraced him upon his return.

3. Jameer Nelson
Classic example of a kid staying in the area for college. Jameer was a Chester kid, a blue collar city just south of Philly, but may as well be included when you talk about Philadelphia. Even more, he went to St. Joe's, so people loved him even more. Hard to argue with Jameer being loved by Philly.

These might be unfair comparisons, but they're ones that need to be made. But there's more. Kobe didn't even go to college, so considering staying in Philly for school never crossed his mind in the eyes of Philly fans. On top of that, Kobe had a swagger about him. He was good, but didn't fully let his game do the talking. He dominated the suburban leagues, and I'm sure he did some damage against some city schools that were scheduled out-of-conference. But at the end of the day, Kobe went home to his mansion in the 'burbs, not the streets of Philadelphia.

Leaving for the NBA was a case of the rich getting richer. No rags in this story. How can Philly fans relate to that? Very few can.

When Kobe is interviewed about Philadelphia, his "hometown", it seems Kobe still doesn't get it. He says - per the E:60 story - and I'm paraphrasing here - that he gets his personality from this city. Sure, he probably hung out in the city and even played in some city summer leagues and on the playgrounds there. To his credit, he gained the respect from other Philly basketball players. But we're not talking about the few talented kids that come out of this area. We're talking about the fans of the entire area. His personality comes from a loving, functional family that never had to struggle like many families do in the city or surrounding, less affluent areas. Again, at the end of the day, Kobe wasn't hustling or worrying about much.

Not all of the Philly area hates Kobe. Just walk into the Pub of Penn Valley in Lower Merion Township and you'll find a sweet Nike Lower Merion Kobe jersey framed on the wall. They're proud to call him their own in Lower Merion. I doubt you'll see many framed jerseys in North or South Philly bars. I challenge you to find them for me.

This is why Philly hates Kobe. And barring a return to Philly to play for the Sixers - and leading them to a championship, too! - I'm not sure there was ever a chance all of Philly would have truly been on his side.

NBA Referee Scandal

Here’s my take on this NBA referee scandal:

I’m a fan of the game of basketball. I like all levels – from high school to professional. I enjoy the beauty and grace of the game, the highly competitive atmosphere, and the natural drama and suspense that comes with the sport. When it comes to referees, I lean toward what the football referees say – that a well-reffed game is one where you don’t even know they’re there. Well, in basketball, that’s a harder objective to achieve. Many plays end with a referee making a call. The ref takes center stage as all eyes waiting for the decision to be made fall on the guy in the black and white stripes. It’s a thankless job and a foregone conclusion – the ref will be scrutinized no matter what. And when the games themselves take a greater stage and come to mean that much more, the role of referee is one that I, for one, would never want to play. These refs are doomed from the start.

And so it comes down to the big games, where a call either way will bring much criticism. And to think a ref could be safe in the land of no-calldom. They’re not. In basketball, the two teams are not the only players in this game. The referees serve as the tippers of the scales of judgment. They’re a necessary evil. They have to be there.

Now, the Tim Donaghey scandal is one thing. There is evidence that he was involved in schemes to affect games beyond his occupational duties. It’s a no-brainer that this is wrong. I’m not arguing this. What I am arguing is that we leave the refs alone. Queue the Brittany guy of YouTube fame. Leave the refs alone! But, seriously – it’s extremely difficult to ref a high school game, let alone an NBA one. There are two, maybe three, refs in charge of following 10 guys at all times. It’s impossible to see everything at all times. The job of a ref is to make sure no one team is getting a distinct advantage. But a game is made of numerous plays. Numerous instances. And numerous scenarios. Refs aren’t there to see the big picture. They’re there to see what’s happening in front of them when it happens. A ref has to make a decision in a split-second’s time. And when this decision may seem wrong, it’s the only thing a ref has to go on at that time.

All refs make bad calls. And all games take on infinite paths to infinite outcomes. There are stories to be written about all of them. The NBA is one big choose-your-own-adventure. And the refs' calls, unfortunately and perhaps unfairly, help to carve out these paths.

I try to stay a fan through all of the B.S. I try not to get involved with the business of the game so I can maintain my standpoint of pure enjoyment. It’s a game, people. When outside forces like gambling take control, of course that’s wrong. But human error is a natural, inside force that must be dealt with and not made a major player. I find it hard to believe that the monopolous NBA would try to manipulate outcomes in favor of better matchups and hence more money. They may have that to lose, but no one else is gaining as a result. Certainly no other leagues out there are gaining on the NBA. Owners are making a ton of money. Merchandising will always be there. There is indeed work to be done, but there will always be challenges to this league. But it’s not a league that’s even remotely close to failing.

Yes, people are arguing that the NBA is not trying to leave this money on the table. And I think this is a ridiculous argument. So leave these refs out of it. They’re merely doing their jobs amidst an ever increasingly critical environment. It’s time to find blame elsewhere, if blame is to be found at all.